Monday, April 19, 2010

More bad news = my world didn't fall apart

Success.. at least a little.

OK- it's not ideal that I got yet another round of bad news today. 
It's not ideal that it has to do with money.
It's not ideal that it made my heart sink to the bottom of my toes.

But it is ideal that I wasn't shaken.

Usually, when I get any bad news at all lately about anything, I fall apart.
Mentally, I start having anxiety about whatever my mind
can grasp onto, blowing the smallest of troubles into monumental struggles.
Spiritually, I ask "Really, God. Are you not listening AT ALL?!?"
Relationally, I take it out on every one I know either by silence, 
withdrawal or with a short and hot temper that burns.

Just this morning I was singing this phrase over and over again in my mind:

"I will put my trust in you
I will put my hope there too
I will stand up on your word
And I will not be shaken"

So this mantra gets tested today.

I celebrate this, what may seem minor to most, 
HUGE victory in my spirit.
A visible change in spirit makes for undeniable changes in my actions.
Do I believe or do I just claim these verses that supposedly get me
 through my days of uncertainty and weak faith? 
Today I believed and it's slowly getting into my spirit and
 making me understand that continual repeated words of truth 
over my life have a profound effect on the way I handle 
the small set-backs and the major upheavals.

I will not be shaken.

Yes, a lump was in my throat at first and my eyes seemed
 a little watery but  I didn't give over to distress and "what if's".

I am finding a bit of truth even now to claim and believe:

Psalm 121:1-2
Where does my help come from? My help comes
 from the Lord the maker of Heaven and Earth.

 Psalm 16:8
I have set the LORD always before me. 
 Because he is at my right hand, 
I will not be shaken.

1 comment:

  1. Wow, this was such an awesome post. I want to say that out loud every morning too. Thanks for posting that, I needed to read it :-)